At Least I'm Not Homeless

"At least I'm not homeless" was something I use to say during the 13 years I was married to my abusive ex-husband.  I said it ALOT actually, until one day I finally said "being homeless has to be better then this!"

I lived at a homeless shelter for 7 months, there were days I slept in my car because there weren't enough beds for everyone and the shelter ran on a lottery system.  There were days I went hungry and days all I ate was mayonnaise and mustard sandwiches.

Every step I've made since that time has been an improvement, every decision I've made has been to better myself, my children's lives, to grow and be thankful.

I didn't receive my bonus this year, and at first I was devastated.  That has always been the money I used to make Christmas happen.  When you live paycheck to paycheck you don't have the funds or the means to save for things like Christmas.

Then I saw on Facebook this morning, that 33 homeless people in Santa Clara County died in 2014 and I said "At least I'm not Homeless".  I may not have the money to have very many gifts under the tree, but at least we have a tree and "At least I'm not Homeless".  We may not be able to have our traditional Prime Rib Christmas dinner but I can promise you, we wont be eating mayonnaise and mustard sandwiches and...... wait for it...... "At least I'm not Homeless".

So many times we look at what we don't have, wont have, can't have.  I want to focus on what I do have, a wonderful Man in my life that does everything he can for his family, 3 wonderful children that deserve the world and yet are happy with just spending time together for the holidays. 2 more children who are, well not children anymore, grown all up one going to college and the other married and living pretty darn close to where the Bone Monsters come from!!!  I have my brother and his family, my in-laws who are all great people.  I have people to love and people who love me.

2015 will be a great year and looking forward to what it brings!!!!

Who is Raistlin?

Since Raistlin got all bent out of shape yesterday about me not talking about his Blankie addiction, I am making this post all about him!!!

So who is Raistlin?  to simply put it, he is a son, step-son, brother, friend, boyfriend, nephew, and he is a pretty pretty princess!! (when Stevi was a baby I would ask her "who's my pretty princess?" and Raistlin would answer, "I am!")

Raistlin is a thumb sucking, blanket toting, game playing, internet chatting, book reading, my little pony watching, dubstep listening, purple loving, brother teasing, sister spoiling, Morgan snuggling, feline adoring, bike partying, monster drinking, bead making, lack of sleep getting wonderful young man.

Raistlin has the purest belief in gender equality, he is sensitive, caring, giving, loving, stubborn, has a hard time negotiating, and doesn't really know what time is an appropriate time to go to bed.

Raistlin is kind, he has sat at a park for 5 hours to make sure his little sister got the best spot for her birthday 2 years in a row!

If you are lucky enough to know Raistlin, you would agree with me, that even though he was a bit jealous I wrote a post about his sister's blanket habits and failed to comment on his, he does deserve to have a whole post pinpointing some of his best qualities!!!

Hunter, Brian, Raistlin, Stevi (and Doug way in the back)

How old is "Too Old" to have a blankie?

The christmas before my 5th birthday my parents told me I had to give Santa Claus my blankie in exchange for a "special" gift.  I can't remember what that special gift was, but I can remember being sad for a long time after Christmas.

A security blanket is something that makes a child feel safe, comfortable, and secure.

So how old is too old to have a blankie?  This is something I found myself asking this just this last week.

Stevi is 4 now, and her blankie is something she has had since she was born.  When Stevi turned 2, the rule was no more blankie at daycare. When she turned 3, the rule was no more blankie outside of the house (not including sleep overs).  When she turned 4, the rule was blankie has to stay in her bedroom, unless she in her pj's ready for bed.

I'm not the kind of parent the set rules based on age, I hated that as a child, and it was hard when one foster home had a set of age related rules and then you go to another foster home with a different set age related rules.  I try to base my rules on my childs maturity level and what I think she can or can't handle.

Recently a little mishap happened and Blankie ended up in San Diego, Blankie is currently on his way home, thanks to a very understanding sister-in-law and wonderful aunt.  It was a good test to see where my daughter was at with letting go.  To put it simply, she's not ready, and I'm ok with that!!